This past weekend saw the conclusion of my five-week workshop. Here is the workshop (what's left of us, we saw a few people leave unexpectedly part way through) as it is at graduation:
I'm off on the far left. It's hard to see, but not hard to imagine—I'm quite a bit tanner now, and a bit blonder as well. Construction in the sun gifted me with a bit of a richer appearance, both in terms of color and bulk. Melanie, the workshop coordinator, has sworn to make me "fat" by her cooking of potatoes, hamburger meat, beans, and copious amounts of cheese. Despite many valiant attempts (and many satisfying dinners) she has yet to succeed.
My new capacity as a volunteer, rather than workshopper, has given me a mental change about the place, as well as a physical change. One can proudly feel like they actually know where they're going around Arcosanti now, and I'm operating in most faculties here available to me—I work here, live here, eat here, give tours here, and am on the Community Council. I no longer live in the dorms, but the "belltower"—a concrete-and-homasote-walled cube at the bottom (note, the bottom, not the top) of the Crafts III building. In a way it is my first real apartment. Although I am not actively paying rent for it, the cost of rent for it is zero due to my position as a volunteer. So I am, in essence, paying for it. I will post pictures of this space. Although it is not necessarily the most "comfortable" space to live in, in the sense that it looks more like a very large concrete closet than a bedroom, it's the ideal artist living/working space. I've already begun to paint and draw with a shipment of art materials that arrived just yesterday.
On that point, I've found that the environment here is extremely conducive to creative pursuits. I've had many novel ideas just in the time that I've been here so far, and many chances to write on them. My only limitation here, it seems, is time and, on occasion, funds for art supplies.
Of course, the begging question in all of this, "will you stay, and for how long?" The staff here at Arcosanti are always anxious for new workshoppers who may grow to be more than just temporary students, but semi-temporary volunteers or more. This ultimately comes down to a personal choice. Arcosanti is not for everyone. Beyond its remoteness and size, the lifestyle is very community oriented and requires, if not by order than by necessity, for people to be willing to give to the project. Thus it becomes a balance between giving and taking—the environment here must feed the person, emotionally, intellectually, or otherwise, for them to feel like they can sustain the kind of giving the project requires—and there's no shortage of need here, in nearly whatever capacity one can think of.
My place in this has been one of deep soul-searching, as fairly early on I had decided I wanted to stay on past the workshop for three months, or thereabouts. The three month timeline was made because it was in August that University of Maryland's fall semester began, where I have an opportunity for free tuition and finish off my undergraduate degree (mostly for resume purposes). However, the confirmation came in just a few days ago, and now I have the option to confirm my attendance to UM in the fall—or, by contrast, in the spring semester. My deadline for this decision is in two weeks.
It's quite a tearing decision—to stay for three months, or at least twice that length. Especially because I truly feel like this place has and will continue to enrich me personally, and allow me a great place to pursue projects in art and writing. Before the workshop was even finished, I had finished the editing process on my first ready-to-be-published novel, Children of Falin, which had been sitting on my desk for months. And I have the energy, creativity, and inspiration to pursue the subsequent novels I've had ideas for, even ones I thought up years ago and never made any full-bodied drafts of.
More than that, I want to see Arcosanti succeed in my own, small way. Graphic and web design may not be direct construction of an arcology, but for people to understand the concept of an arcology or what Arcosanti itself is, that information has to be conveyed some how in a visual way. That includes text layout, typography, image manipulation, print layout, and the implementation of rich media on the web. These are all the duties of a graphic designer. I know that, even if I can do all these things, still it will be only a drop in the sea, and yet seas are made of drops of water. So my decision will rely on a number of factors. But on occasion, through the busy workday, I get to take the opportunity to sit on top of the vaults, or stop and look at the Ceramics Apse. It's easy to forget how special and unique this place is when you live here and work here, day in and day out. And in that way I'm glad that I do tours, since outside people remind me of how unique it is. But, at times, it's the sheer beauty of the structures here that does it—and the vapor of Soleri's writings and thoughts that surround the structures that also encourages me to explore, study, and push farther than I had before.
I don't think I'll be here forever, but I do feel like I may be here for a considerable amount of time. I have the feeling that this place for me is going to be a formative place—especially in my post-church exile state. It will allow me to do many things I've always wanted to, and it will bring challenges to me that will teach me how to communicate effectively with myself and others. All that sounds rather dry and dull, even semi-romantic. But now that I'm twenty one, it's as if a chapter in my life has closed, and now a completely new one has opened—one where I feel many of the things I've wanted to do are within my reach. I'm quite happy to see this place be the setting for that next chapter.
Dude, you're practically the new me! There was a time when I was on the Community Council, doing graphic design work, and living in the Bell Tower (and showering in the Foundry...). My number one piece of advice: clear out every last nook and cranny in that room, and caulk the bloody hell out of any gap you can find. Otherwise, the Hualapi Tigers will absolutely eat you alive. The memories are not pleasant...
ReplyDeleteOne reason the residents are so curious as to whether you're staying on is because the constant flux of people can be rather traumatizing to the long-term population. *So* many fascinating people come through Arcosanti, and five weeks is just long enough to get to know them and become really attached. But when they leave, you don't say "see you later"; you say "have a nice life", because bitter experience has taught you that that is how it'll be.
After a few workshop cycles, most residents begin to armor themselves against forming bonds with the workshoppers, in order to avoid feeling the pain of their forthcoming departure. Thus when they ask whether you're staying for longer, they're really asking if it's safe to get to know you; if an emotional investment in a friendship won't be immediately taken away.
Thanks for the advice Nathan—and I have swept/cleaned the inside of the location, though a towel under the door and some other once-overs is a good idea. (For those reading, Hualapai Tigers are also called Cone-nose bugs, and are basically an elaborate mosquito in beetle form.)
ReplyDeleteIt's sad to hear what you said about the transient nature of the community… though it's not surprising. Again, thanks for the advice.